Weasel Of Doom

DemonChild (from the back seat):

“No hitting Keith…… That’s not nice!….. No pushing Tyler…… No hitting Keith!…… No hitting Tyler…. No hitting Keith…. That’s very bad… No hitting Keith….”

Me (taking a stab at parenting):

“Have you been hitting Keith?”

DemonChild (after a long silence, sounding undecided):

“Noooooooooooooooo….”

Me (deciding to play it safe since, after all, we have not had any complaints from daycare):

“You are right. We don’t hit people. Hitting is not nice!”

DemonChild (thoughtfully):

“No hitting Keith….. No pushing Tyler…. No hitting Keith…..”

Squeeker (not to be left out of the conversation):

“Wah wah papa wah wah snow bah bah mama”

EDITED TO ADD:

I am not worried that DemonChild is beating the crap out of poor Keith :-) DemonChild is the runt of the litter in that room, and Keith can stand up for himself. Not to mention that DemonChild’s modus operandi for dealing with adversity is throwing himself on the floor, weeping, wailing, and bashing head on wall for emphasis rather than, you know, actually smacking somebody to get a toy back.

DemonChild also has a habit of repeating sentences that weren’t necessarily addressed to him. “No pooping in the tub!” is one such favorite, told often and with grave emphasis. He has NOT ONCE pooped in the tub. That dubious honor goes to Squeektar.

So there are three possibilities to the whole “no hitting” thing:

(1) Keith is the one doing the hitting, and DemonChild is omitting a crucial comma in his recital (“No hitting, Keith!”)
(2) Keith gets hit a lot, so an imprecation to stop hitting him is heard often (“No hitting Keith!”)
(3) DemonChild was told not to hit Keith. (“No hitting Keith, DemonChild! That’s not nice!”)

Knowing the players involved, (1) or (2) are a lot more likely than (3). I may ask his teachers, just in case, but as I said above, not too worried about it.