Weasel Of Doom

(First, I want to thank all of you for your kind thoughts and condolences. I will write a nice long post in memory of my grandma soon. But for now, something to (hopefully) make you smile.)

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[My Mom, helpfully]: You need to work out to get rid of the weight around your middle.
[Me]: Nah, this way if the hard times come, the family will have something to eat.
[Mom]: How can you say something like that?! You have three children!
[Me]: That’s right, we’ll start with Squeektar, he is the fattest.

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[Dad]: We need to go to the store, we have nothing to eat!
[Me]: I’ve got milk.

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[OldestOne mutters something unintelligible at the dinner table]
[Mom]: What did he say?
[Me]: I have no idea, but I am pretty sure he was mouthing off.

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My poor parents, see what they have to put up with?